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The older you get, the farther away from pussy you become. Just admit and accept it... it's not meant for you. If it hasn't happened by now, it's not going to. It's time for you to come to terms with that. It's exhausting to keep trying to get pussy when it never goes in your favor! nor is it ever going to. It's time to explore other avenues.
It's been a long time of no freedom. No touching, no stroking, no pussy. Absolutely nothing. You have become desperate and incredibly weak. The dry spell has gotten to you. Not only physically, but mentally. It's reached the point of desperation where you just need some sort of pleasure, which has guided you down new avenues. You often find yourself wondering what gay sex would be like.
No weekend plans. No sex. No friends. No girlfriend. NOTHING for you. I want you to sit right where you are for the entire weekend and pump yourself raw to femdom porn. Your porn and masturbation addiction is your lifeline, and without it, you're a dull and worthless nobody. This is the only thing you have going for you, gooner.